Chris: Well, some sit down.
Rory: No, I can’t stay.
Rory: I don’t want you calling Mom anymore.
Rory: I want you to stay away from her.
Chris: Rory, I –
Rory: Mom’s in a relationship now, and she’s doing really great. He’s kind, and, well, he’s there. And she’s happy.
Chris: I think that’s great, Rory. I –
Rory: You’ll mess it up! You’ll mess everything up! Because every time you come back, it always ends up the same way. Mom’s crying and you’re not being there and I know it’s not your fault, I know you don’t mean it to be that way, but that’s how it is.
Chris: I just needed some help. That’s all.
Rory: Well, next time you need help, call a nanny, or a babysitter, or call me. Just leave Mom alone. I’m sorry, I have to go. Kiss Gigi for me.
Gilmore Girls 5x06, Norman Mailer, I’m Pregnant
To preface this episode, I’d like to start by saying that Kirk dresses up as a giant hot dog. Wait, no. Weiner. The costume tag says “weiner.” Sorry, Kirk…my apologies! I’d also like to add that I’m so glad he thought the “kiesch made [him] look fat” because Kirk in a weiner costume is priceless…especially when you watch him waddle from the curb to the street. Ha!
Moving on, Zach finally reaches his processing limit and makes a decision…he wants to date Lane! Yay!
Claps hands in excitement. They arrange their first date for later that evening, with them both emerging from their prospective bed chambers looking refined and glamorous (per the “look nice for your first date” rule). Opting for a low maintenance outing, they decide to finish a film they started the night before—meaning they don’t even leave their apartment—only to have Brian plop down in between them when he comes home. They quickly explain that they’re “on a date” and Lane offers Brian use of her room so she and Zach can share some alone time. Their chill evening ends with a goodnight kiss…with Brian asleep and dangling around Zach’s shoulders. ¡Qué romántico!
As for Rory, she finds herself struggling to find a topic for an interesting feature story for the Yale Daily News. That is, until she finds herself sharing the same bathroom with a gorilla-mask-wearing, ball-gown-adorned mystery girl. With the reporter mind-set she possesses, Rory follows the girl outside and watches as she climbs into an expensive SUV while shouting, “In Omnia Paratus!” Lo and behold, our girl’s found herself a story! With some investigation, she finds that the phrase is linked to a Yale secret society called the Life and Death Brigade and that Logan Huntzberger is one of the members. And she’ll do anything to uncover the mystery that surrounds this group. Watch out, Logan. Ace is on your trail.
Now, what about that parting scene between Rory and Christopher? Talk about a giant fist to the gut…just ouch! On the one hand, as a father, that’s a harsh bit of truth to be dealt to you by your child. On the other, I think it’s past due. I cheer on my girl Rory for summoning the confidence, not to mention the repressed anger and disappointment, to tell her father that he hasn’t been there…to his face. Not only does she do this to secure her mother’s happiness, but I think a small part of her does it for her own sake as well. Rory finally finds the courage to point out that Christopher hasn’t been there for her as a father. (Luke’s been a much more permanent fixture in her life, to be honest.) She knows “it’s not his fault,” but it still hurts that he’s played this absentee role. And I don’t think she wants history to repeat itself with Gigi. So, Christopher, it’s time to face the facts: You haven’t been there. Someone else has. And that’s a harsh truth to swallow…